In my 30+ years of homeschooling, I’ve had my fair share of seasons where I felt overwhelmed by the responsibility of teaching my kids with dyslexia and ADHD at home. When I felt this way, I was frozen with fear and unable to see where to make meaningful changes. Then fatalistic thoughts of my kids never finding success as adults or thoughts of how I was ruining my kids would flood in.

What I’ve learned about overwhelm as one-by-one my kids graduate from high school, is that it’s usually less about what we’re doing (or not doing) in our homeschool and more about having the wrong mindset or expectations for our kids at least in some areas.

Students with dyslexia learn differently. They learn with different methods and on a different time frame. They also have different and unique strengths.

If we don’t know about these differences, it’s easy to simply replicate what our own school experience was like or copy what traditional schools or curricula are doing. Then, for the very same reason these traditional methods and expectations fail kids who are attending traditional schools, they fail our kids at home.

Stop #1: Chasing Someone Else’s Timeline

In my latest book, No More School: Meeting the Educational Needs of Students With Dyslexia and Language-Based Learning Difficulties, I go in depth about how our current school system got its structure of grade levels (for organization) and academic expectations (for average abilities). 

The truth is that, just as toddlers learn to walk and talk at different rates, all kids learn to learn on their own unique timeline. Students with dyslexia have an entirely different timeline of learning than traditional learners. This is caused by a delay in mastering language arts and weaknesses in memory and sometimes organization that delay certain types of academics. 

Key takeaway: If we’re overly focused on trying to catch up to traditional learners, we’re going to increase anxiety, resistance and burnout. 

Stop #2: Trying to Fix Everything at Once

When we’re operating from this mindset of catching up to traditional learning, it’s tempting to pile on the academics. We feel we can’t simply teach reading in 5th grade, we feel compelled to add spelling, vocabulary, writing, and literature as well – even though our child is not a fluent reader yet.

This heavy cognitive load scatters focus and is a sure recipe for overwhelm. What a lot of parents don’t know about teaching dyslexic learners is that learning is MUCH easier when the brain is ready to receive that information. Readiness comes at all different ages for kids with dyslexia. One thing is for sure though – when the brain is ready to receive, learning happens and happens quickly. 

Key takeaway: Sometimes, one or two focused priorities done well beats five done before our child is ready. 

Stop #3: Constantly Changing Course

My early days of homeschooling were full of curriculum swapping. I’d try one curriculum and if my kids struggled to learn, I’d sell it and try another. Panic-driven decision-making may feel good at the moment. We feel that this new curriculum or class or supplement is THE answer to our homeschool  problems. 

While there are times when a curriculum is not a good fit, more often than not the program can be adjusted or modified to make it work for our students. Or maybe that subject can be delayed for a time.

Key takeaway: Changes to our homeschool plans don’t need to be frequent or big to make a positive impact on our kids’ learning.

What to Do Instead

When things aren’t going how we would like in our homeschools, the most important thing to do is to decide what matters the most right now. Figuring out what is most important depends on the child’s age, learning struggles, current abilities, and their openness to learning (or level of resistance). 

For our younger kids who aren’t reading yet, at least one of our priorities is probably going to be teaching reading. Then, if there isn’t time for other typical subjects, we rest, knowing that this is a season for our child to focus on learning to read. 

For our older kids who may be in or close to high school, we’re going to begin to focus on helping them become independent readers and writers with the use of assistive technology. 

Ultimately, what our kids are able to achieve academically will vary widely. The good news is that as homeschoolers we have a LOT of freedom to give our kids the individualized education they need. 

We can prioritize what matters most, tailor their learning to meet their needs, and measure their progress with the appropriate dyslexia-oriented guidelines.

When Personalized Help Can Bring Clarity

Most parents I work with don’t need to completely overhaul their homeschool. They aren’t doing everything wrong. In fact, they’re usually doing far more than they need to be doing.

What they often need is help stepping back and seeing their homeschool clearly — identifying what to stop doing, what to keep doing, and what can wait for another season. When we’re overwhelmed, it’s very hard to sort through this on our own, especially when fear and self-doubt are loud.

This is often where one-on-one consulting helps the most. Not by adding more to your plate, but by helping you confidently let go of what’s no longer serving your child, and focus on the few things that truly support learning and long-term success.

An Invitation for Support

If you’d like help clarifying your priorities,

if you want a calm, experienced perspective on what matters most right now,

or if you don’t want to figure this out alone,

I offer one-on-one homeschool consulting for parents homeschooling kids with dyslexia and ADHD. These conversations are designed to help you leave with clarity, reassurance, and a realistic plan — not more pressure.

You can learn more about my consulting services here.

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